Reminder... What other people think or say does not change the truth.
When we've been deeply wounded, it is common to have a desperate need to be heard, believed, and to feel supported. It can feel devastating when the person who hurt us denies or lies about what they've done, and it can produce a response inside of us where we feel the need to convince others of the truth. The pain that was caused to us was bad enough, but the fear that people don't believe us, or that they think we're exaggerating, can feel even worse than the original abuse. Feeling abandoned or judged by others for choosing boundaries and seeking safety is excruciating. But here's the thing I want to share with you, my friend. It really doesn't matter what lies are told. It doesn't matter what other people think. I get that it hurts to not receive the support you deserve, but what I want you to hold onto is the fact that the truth is the truth regardless of what anyone else says or thinks. Hold onto the truth! You know the truth. God knows the truth. And deep down, the person who harmed you knows the truth as well. Do not chase their lies. Do not try to convince people to believe you. Let them think what they will and trust that time will reveal the true character of the person who hurt you. If your friends and family don't understand and are not able to support you, then pursue support with people who do understand. Go to the Celebrate Recovery abuse support group. Connect with the team at The Mend Project. Meet with a counselor. Stop spending time and energy trying to get support from people who are not able to offer it. And above all, do not allow the opinion of others to cause you to shrink back from being honest about the abuse you've endured or from creating the boundaries you deserve. There is freedom in the truth.
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